Manners-

 

Manners maketh Man, or woman, or child, let’s not be too distinct about this.

From an early age we are told to mind our manners. Remembering to say please and thank you and to respect our elders but does this always ring true in this day and age?

Swearing

What is the worse swear word you heard your parents utter?  Being now in my sixties, I think  my parents and grandparents came from a different era.  The worse word I ever heard my father say was “damn and bust it.”  Martin laughs when he recalls his father saying “hells bells and buckets of blood.”  Now-a-days, much of the swear words you hear in the street can make your toes curl.  Some people, boys and girls, men and women, use the ‘f’ word as an everyday adjective.  We never ever used the ‘c’ word.  You can tell by the way I am writing that I can’t even type them out! However, dear bloggee I will admit, used in the correct way at the correct moment, a choice swear word can be a great stress reliever.  One of my favourites is ‘bugger it’ or ‘tosser’ if I’m driving, which sets my friend Karen into fits of laughter.  I only use the ‘f’ word on very special occasions.

Respect

Is it me or has respect for your elders gone out of the window?  I always stand up for older people on busses, or hold the door open for the person behind me but I rarely hear adults addressed as Mr or Mrs so and so unless they are school teachers and to cheek your elders when a child would get you a severe reprimand  from your parents.  Nowadays, you are more than likely to be told to ‘f’ off, if you remonstrate with a youth.

Hand signals

What is your preference? A good old V sign or the more recently acquired American middle finger technique as a hand gesture?  I can’t remember the last time I had to perform one, unless you count one to my husband which does occasionally happen.  I have to admit I used to get very offended if car drivers gave them to me so now I never make eye contact with anyone in cars.  I have occasionally ignored friends because of this. So it does have its disadvantages.

Theatre/Cinema Etiquette

Oh my goodness, nothing annoys me more than  rustling sweet papers behind me, in a theatre or cinema.  Or people talking and don’t get me started on singing audience members in musicals!  I pay a lot of money to hear the professionals not Hilda Bloggs next to me singing off key.  I also am getting cheesed off at all the phones at concerts!  Whatever happened to being in the moment? Not only is it very annoying it restricts your view, it looks like something out of a sci-fi film where techno addiction is a disease.  OK, yes I am guilty of taking a sneaky David Essex pic but it came out blurry anyway.  I apologise if this is turning into a Victor Meldrew type rant but come on, you have to admit standards of good manners are slipping.

Hugging

Are you a hugger?  My family are divided on this.  I like it but I never grew up with it.  I never hugged strangers or people I had only been introduced to a few seconds ago.  As for air kissing.  It seems to have been imported from the French.  Should you kiss once or twice? And which side first? I was quite old when I realised you only kissed the air! I recoil in horror when I think of the many whiskered old people I planted a wet kiss on their cheek or neck. Of course family and good friend hugging and kissing is always acceptable but anyone else, isn’t it more polite to ask first instead of being drawn into a bear hug when breathing seems to be an option.

Farting

Farts are not always funny, unless you are in the Ronchetti family where it seems to be a national pass-time, the louder the better.  After forty-two years I am getting used to it but I still think it is the height of bad manners to do it in public.  The look Martin got once in Egypt at the son-et-lumière at Karnak temple by two middle aged women sitting along from us was pure horror.  Martin didn’t care though and as my mother once said “it didn’t pay the rent so out it goes”. Is there no hope?  I have to guiltily admit, sometimes it can be hilarious.

Children

I am pleased to say all my children are bringing their children up with please and thank yous, and good table manners.  Although they too all think farting is hilarious.  I give up!

Did anyone watch Last One Laughing?  The idea of the programme is to make each other laugh.  I challenge anyone not to laugh watching this.